A-hem. Um, hi there. As you well know, I had a baby! So, yeah, that explains why I haven't posted since...before she was born. Well, let's just jump right back into it, shall we?
So, Baby M. She's petite and blonde, with dark-blue eyes and enormous rosy cheeks. She's the love of my life, and I feel like we're getting to know and appreciate each other more every day. Just this past Sunday, for instance, S, Baby M, and I accepted an invite to join S's friend D at church. (Yes, church! Entering the sanctuary was like setting foot on the moon, I swear. It had been a long, long, long, LONG time since I'd been to church. It felt so foreign.) Anyway, we tried dropping Baby M off in the nursery with the other little cuties, but we were retrieved from the service a few minutes later by one of the caregivers, who told us Baby M "just won't stop crying." When S and I followed the caregiver back to the nursery and I scooped teary Baby M into my arms, she stopped crying within moments, and it made me feel really good. (One of the caregivers even remarked, "Isn't that amazing?") It was the first time I could think of that I was able to stop Baby M's crying so quickly and easily. In the early months, Baby M cried inconsolably, and it took all of my effort and creativity to put an end to it; often, she'd just cry herself out, and nothing I'd do would squelch the meltdowns any more quickly. It made me feel so incapable and hopeless. Now, I see from time to time that Baby M trusts me and responds to me and feels obviously comforted by me. It's a relief.
Tomorrow I start back at my old company working part time. I'll have Mondays and Fridays home with Baby M---hooray! I've never felt so confident and right about a decision I've made as I do about this decision to stop working full time. Granted, S and I will be eating lots of 49-cent Ramen noodles and cutting back on such luxuries as, you know, buying shoes and whatnot to be able to afford our apartment, but it's worth it.
Monday, November 06, 2006
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